Youth Motivational Speaker

By Jeff Yalden

When you’re a teenager, changes come at you constantly.

Physical, social and emotional changes are just part of being a teenager. Learning to deal with them is part of growing up.

Maybe this is your first year in high school, and suddenly you’ve got tons of homework – plus a demanding new coach and your first after-school job.

Everyone expects so much more of you. And if you mess up, there are serious consequences.

Or maybe your closest friends have started acting weird. They’re getting into stupid stuff and pressuring you to go along.

Things at home might be different. Your parents may be fighting a lot or getting divorced.

It could be that for the first time in your life you’ve got body odor, and it’s freaking you out. That’s a change. How are you going to deal with it?

Changes can be positive too.

Say you went out for your favorite sport and you made the team. Or you got the job you applied for or a lead role in the school play.

That’s great, right?!

Sure, but your success comes with new demands. The coach (or your boss, or the drama teacher) expects you at practice every day – on time and ready to go. She won’t hear excuses or cut you any slack.

My point is that both positive and negative changes can stress you out. Change can make you feel anxious, confused, angry and overwhelmed.

Change also can make you feel out of control or powerless.

To help you cope, here are Jeff Yalden’s 4 rules about change.

Rule #1. How you react is up to you.

Most people fight change. We piss and moan. We blame other people. Or we get down on ourselves.

Sometimes we ignore the changes, hoping they’ll go away.

It’s all useless, my friends. You can’t control change.

Here’s the one thing you can control – how you respond. Instead of acting out, choose to respond positively.

You can choose to accept the changes coming your way.

You can also choose to wear deodorant!

Rule #2. Dealing well with change creates happiness.

The ability to deal well with change is what separates people who are successful from those who aren’t.

So instead of getting mad or resisting change, try working with it. Choose to become better, instead of bitter.

Roll with the situation you’re dealing with, then figure out how to make it work for you.

You’ll find it a lot easier to get along. You’ll feel happier too.

Rule #3. It’s not about you.

Over the next few years, you’re going to face tons of new situations, new people, new rules.

Whatever you do, don’t take any of it personally.

For example, you’ll find that the teachers, coaches and other adults in your life are treat you differently. Some are warm and understanding, others tough and unforgiving.

It’s not that they don’t like you. It’s not about you at all. We teach differently because we have different personalities. It’s as simple as that.

Learn to adapt. You can also try to understand where the authority figure is coming from, then work with that.

Rule # 4. Change is growth.

Without change there is no life. Change is life moving forward.

Every change that comes your way, even the really tough ones, contains an opportunity. You might not see it at first, but every time one door closes, another door opens.

So be positive. Look for the openings in the changes that are coming your way.

And if you’ve got B.O., wear deodorant!

Copyright 2009 © Jeff Yalden International. All rights reserved.