Why Should I Love You if You Don’t Love Yourself?

I had an awesome week.  I spoke everywhere from Pittsburgh, PA, to Albany, to Wyoming, and then I finished off in Denver. I’ve got the greatest job in the world. As motivational speaker for teens, I got to speak to over 6,000 students, teachers and educators this week.

My question for you

In every high school audience I speak to, I find that one lady in the audience who I think may be popular and is attractive, and I’ll ask this one question: “Are you as beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside?” 97 out of 100 times I ask that question, I get a blank stare.

I hear answers like, “I don’t know” or sometimes even “No.”  That saddens me so much.

Young people today are inundated with advertisements, games, media, music, and TV shows. Everyone is trying to sell you on how you should appear on the outside. What’s important is who you are in the inside. That’s the internal picture that you have of yourself.  It’s a measure of how much you value and respect yourself.

Develop self-respect

When you get caught up with the media and what other people are doing, you get an unrealistic view of what the perfect body is. As a result, you spend too much time working on the outside. When you don’t have that self respect on the inside, you are going to under-appreciate your own abilities, strengths, and personal values.

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When you spend too much time on the $150 of Ugg boots and the $150 pair of jeans-you’re buying into the wrong things and you are going to be depleted.

When I ask you that question: “Are you as beautiful on the insde as you are on the outside?” and you can’t say “Yes,” as a man I’m thinking,  “Yeah you’re pretty, but do you know what you are? You’re all hat, no cattle. I want someone who has the cattle but doesn’t need to wear the hat.

I want you to be beautiful on the inside. Because if you take care of that-the outside just radiates with beauty.

The big question is simply this: “Why should I love you if you don’t love yourself?” I don’t want to love someone who is more interested in the facade than they are with the interior.

Develop new habits

What I want you to do is have the courage to wake up every day, look in the mirror, and create a habit: Look in the mirror and say, “I’m smart. I’m strong. I’m capable, and I can do it.” And more importantly, “I’m as beautiful on the inside as I am on the outside.”

When you start believing that, and living in this way; you’re not going to have to worry about respect from others, because you’re going to be more concerned with giving that respect.

You’re going to look at yourself like a tiger, and tigers don’t lose sleep over the opinions of sheep.

I hope to meet you soon

One day if I meet you at one of my motivational speeches, I hope you’ll say, “Jeff, I love the person that I am, and I’m as beautiful on the inside than I am on the outside,” and then I will just give you a big hug.

How do you feel? Do you feel as beautiful on the inside as you do on the outside? Let us know in the comments below.

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