Teen Suicide . . . Expectations to be #1 Video
Teen Mental Health expert and Suicide Prevention Trainer, Jeff Yalden talks about society expectations and how it’s impacting our teens in a negative way leading to more and more teen suicides. It’s an epidemic, America.
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– Be a lighthouse, instead of a helicopter. Be reliably there for your child, but committed to helping him or her learn to ride the waves. “Children who feel secure, without feeling controlled, have less to rebel against in the teen years and may be more comfortable managing their own lives as adults,” he says.
– Praise your child’s effort, not the outcome. A child who is only praised for the outcome, such as solving a puzzle, may become afraid of causing disappointment compared to the child praised for what they did to get to where they could solve the puzzle.
– Speak in sentences with “and” instead of “but” when disciplining your child. Praise children for what they did correctly “and” add your expectations to correct what they failed to do.
– When your child is sad, anxious or overly sensitive, see their feelings as strength that will someday help them. Empathy and feelings are not enemies, Jeff says.
– Tackle your own ambivalence about getting help before asking your child to seek help. They will read your mixed emotions and risk becoming more ashamed or resistant to help.
– Develop a code word that your child can use when they need to leave a situation. Allow the child to shift the blame to the “mean” mom or dad as a reason to leave.
– Check in with your children when they get home. If they know they will need to talk (and could be smelled or sensed), it can help them create their own boundaries.
– Use dinnertime to be a role model to your children. Talk about your most embarrassing moment, the biggest problem you faced at work today and how you overcame it, and what went well and what did not go well that day.
For more information about Jeff Yalden and suicide prevention in your community, please visit www.JeffYaldenFoundation.com.